By Bob Gaydos

Donald Trump at Texas flood site.

Writing about how the nuts and bolts of federal government work, or are supposed to work, is often an exercise in trying to make the boring readable, if not necessarily interesting.

Not this time. This time, with nuts and bolts falling off the MAGA truck at seemingly every turn, I trust the reading will be not only interesting, but likely, infuriating.

Let’s start with the news that Dan Bongino, Deputy FBI director, may be on the verge of quitting in a major rift with Attorney General Pam Bondi over the suddenly disappearing  Epstein files.

Bongino is a conspiracy theorist who built a career as a podcaster in large part by demanding release of sexual predator Jeffrey Epstein’s client list and accusing unnamed government officials of concealing it. This podcast popularity probably played a large part in him getting the job as assistant FBI director since he has no other real qualifications for the job.

Bongino expressed his anger with Bondi loudly in a meeting after a memo was leaked saying the FBI found no client list and also that Epstein did indeed commit suicide in his prison cell. That development came shortly after Bondi publicly said she had the files on her desk and she was waiting to review them.

To his credit here, Bongino is at least sticking to his guns and insisting there’s a list and demanding that the government release the files, whatever and whomever they include. Bondi, a Grade A Trump bootlicker, obviously feels otherwise.

There’s been speculation that FBI Director Kash Patel, whose qualifications for his job are also sketchy, is also unhappy with the way Bondi handled the situation. There have been rumors that both Patel and Bongino may step down. Nuts and bolts falling everywhere.

This is clearly not how government is supposed to operate. It would also be a unique development in a Trump administration. Two high ranking individuals resigning on a seeming matter of moral principle that could possibly implicate Trump.

The other major story, of course, is the flash flood in Texas that has claimed more than 100 lives so far, many of them young girls at a summer camp. Tragic. And even more wheels falling off the MAGA truck.

In addition to the well-reported fact that Trump ordered major cuts in the National Weather Service staff, thereby increasing the likelihood of weakened forecasting abilities, it turns out that National Security Director Kristi Noem, who oversees FEMA, required that requests for more than $100,000 in aid come to her desk, but ignored such requests from Texas for three days. Noem also unbelievably said that the federal government doesn’t handle state emergencies.

In addition, a downsized FEMA staff failed to answer thousands of phone calls from residents of Texas in the aftermath of the deadly flood. And David Richardson, FEMA director, who rarely even talks to staff, never showed up in Texas during or after the tragic flood. Instead, he was at a conference somewhere else where he didn’t even participate. Not a word from the FEMA director. Not even a presence. Nuts and bolts all over the ground.

For his part, Trump showed up in Texas more than a week late and rambled on in some kind of speech about rain. Nuts. He also muttered something about maybe not cutting so much FEMA funding after all. That convenient suggestion of change in policy probably didn’t soothe the pain of residents of Texas, especially parents who lost their young daughters to a raging river. Bolts.

And what the heck, while we’re at it, there’s that lingering nuts and bolts how-does-government-work question about who ordered the cancellation of weapons shipments to Ukraine. Trump, when asked about it at a press conference, said, “I don’t know.”

If that didn’t freeze the blood in every American citizen, I don’t know what will. The man with the power to authorize or reject military action, the man who ordered a bombing of Iran, didn’t know who ordered the cutoff of weapons to Ukraine.

He actually whispered to Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, “Do you know?”

Hegseth said, “No.”

Even scarier. No how-things-work here to even talk about, but I’ll take a stab. For what it’s worth, I have some friends in recovery who tell me they learned that they did some pretty scary things when they were in alcoholic blackouts and today still have no memory of it. Zilch.

Nuts and bolts, anyone?

By Bob Gaydos

A deadly flash flood killed more than 100 people in Texas.

I’m so angry. Angry that the daily insanity of life with Trump makes it difficult to be sad. Just sad. Not frustrated and sad. Not bewildered and sad. Not dumbfounded and sad. Not furious and sad. Just sad.

The overlapping and competing of emotions is a byproduct of having to wake up each day in a “what the hell did he do or say now?” world. Like most of you, I’ve come to expect that, although I hesitate to say I’m used to it.

But that doesn’t matter when I just want to feel the sadness and sorrow for the families of all those young girls who drowned when a raging Guadalupe River swamped their summer camp in Central Texas. My god, what a tragedy. Impossible to imagine.

But at the same time, I also have to deal with the fact that Elon Musk, richest and second weirdest man on the planet, says he wants to start a new political party in the United States, to put pressure on both Republican and Democrats to create his view of society, which could have the beneficial effect of frustrating Trump’s MAGA agenda simply because Musk has so much money and he apparently now hates Trump. And he knows how to rig elections. So, is this good or bad?

Plus, Musk is the one who said Trump’s name was all over the Epstein files, and he likely had a look at them when he was Dogeing. But now, Pam Bondi, a thoroughly horrid human being, says those Epstein files she said she had on her desk to review, in effect, don’t exist. No client list, the attorney general says. And Jeffrey committed suicide. Case closed. And I am beyond angry at this load of BS and coverup for Epstein’s good friend, Donald Trump.

Meanwhile, the death toll in Texas is now more than 100 and they are still looking for more than 160 people, including 12-year-old girls missing from the church camp and you just know many won’t be found alive at this point and I am depressed thinking of them and area residents trapped in their homes.

As the story continued for days, Trump hadn’t said much about the deaths and, when asked if he would go to Texas, he said “maybe Friday.” But while the flood was still raging, he was putting on his greens and eating ice cream.

Yet he had previously had no trouble making a quick visit to fawn over the cruelly named Alligator Alcatraz in Florida. And I am angry again that this concentration camp for immigrants and whomever else ICE snatches off the streets actually sells souvenir merchandise and that it was thrown up in a couple of days in an area crawling with alligators and prone to flooding and that it is all pipes and canvas and wire and could be blown over in a heartbeat as hurricane season comes to Florida.

Which, of course, Trump didn‘t consider or care about when he decimated the workforce of the National Weather Service, which may have contributed to the lack of advance warning in Texas, for which Trump will accept no blame, as usual. Nor will he show any human empathy for the victims and their families. Incapable.

Meanwhile, rescue help pours into Texas, including from Mexico, and money for the rescue and the victims — millions — is pledged by just regular citizens, Trump still hasn’t shown his face or said that he’ll make sure the advance warning system the people of Kenn County asked the state of Texas to pay for but got only chump change will actually be built, even though he has effectively eliminated FEMA.

For me at least, the profound sadness this story deserves gets lost in anger over the lack of preparedness or concern for all affected and all the nonsense previously mentioned above as well as the insulting news that Bibi Netanyahu has written a letter nominating Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize for dropping a dozen bombs on Iran, blowing up a lot of rock and stuff, but likely no uranium and probably guaranteeing that country will now certainly develop a nuclear bomb. And that Bibi will now be Trump’s new best friend since he says he’s disappointed in Putin and, well, you know about Musk.

And yes, there will be, Trump has decreed, a mixed martial arts fight on the White House lawn next Fourth of July to properly celebrate this country’s 250th birthday. Seating for 20,000. No word on ticket prices yet.

I am beyond sad.

By Bob Gaydos

Something to consider as you stock the cooler, clean the grill and get the burgers, hot dogs and buns ready for Friday’s Fourth of July celebration: On the eve of Independence Day, Paramount Global, parent company of CBS, agreed to give Donald Trump $16 million because he didn’t like the way the staff at 60 Minutes, the premiere news show at CBS, edited an interview with Kamala Harris last October.

That’s pretty much the gist. Paramount, an entertainment company which has no business owning a news media operation, figured it was cheaper to buy off the president of the United States, than go to court and defend its journalists’ rights under the First Amendment  to the Constitution. A free press, to be specific.

Trump, who was running for president against Harris at the time, sued 60 Minutes, claiming the edited interview was defamatory to him. Editors at 60 Minutes, which has continued to tell the truth about Trump, said it wasn’t. The board at Paramount said we have a bottom line to worry about, new projects to worry about and we don’t want Trump siccing his legal goons on us. They didn’t say that, but that’s the gist.

Trump, who threatens lawsuits almost as much as he lies, just recently threatened to sue both CNN and The New York Times for their reporting on leaked information regarding U.S. bomb strikes on nuclear power sites in Iran.

Trump immediately bragged that the attacks had “decimated” Iran’s nuclear weapon capability. But U.S. intelligence reports a couple of days after the attack cast serious doubt on that assessment. Trump demanded a retraction of the reports by both news agencies.

CNN and The Times stuck to their guns and their reporting. CNN said it will issue no retraction. The Times issued a statement saying, “No retraction is needed. No apology will be forthcoming. We told the truth to the best of our ability. We will continue to do so.”

I sincerely hope so. The Times appears to have gotten over its infatuation with tiptoeing around Trump. Couldn’t have come at a more important time.

The truth is the truth and a free press is a free press. Both have been under constant attack since Trump entered national politics and, unfortunately, a lot of Americans in my opinion have forgotten what it means to have a free and independent press.

You hear a lot of complaints about the so-called “mainstream media,” whoever that may be, but I think the slow death of so many local newspapers, bought up by corporate interests with no journalistic background and concerned only with their bottom lines, has caused many Americans to forget what it means to have a free and independent press delivered every day on their doorstep.

After a while, you don’t know what you don’t know because nobody’s telling you. Except for Trump and his henchmen on social media. And Trump siccing his lawyers on anyone who dares even suggest that he might not be telling the truth.

You can say this is a bit personal for me since I spent more than 40 years working for daily newspapers, 23 of them writing editorials on an almost daily basis. I loved it. From my observation, so did most of the people I worked with. Also, from my observation, the people running the show recognized that, with the freedom guaranteed under the Constitution came a responsibility to be honest and truthful and factual. That’s our job. Tell the truth. Let him sue. We’re not called the Fourth Estate for nothing.

Anyway, something to think about. Have a hotdog on me, forget about the fireworks and maybe let the people at 60 Minutes know you appreciate their efforts.

rjgaydos@gmail.com

By Bob Gaydos

Trump drops an F bomb on Israel and Iran on the White House lawn for making him look bad.

Ok, let’s start with what we know.

— We know that the U.S.  dropped several “bunker-busting” bombs and also launched a bunch of missiles from submarines, targeting three nuclear weapons facilities in Iran.

— Trump did not consult with Congress,as required by law, before he ordered the attack.

That’s it.

We know this not only because Donald Trump said so, but because Iran and Congress confirmed it.

What we don’t know could fill thousands of inches of newspaper copy, untold hours of TV and podcast time and millions of hours on social media. In fact, it has. In fact, that’s why I stopped making a list of what we don’t know as I started writing this column, realizing that, with Donald Trump, you just never know.

That’s because with Trump, he never knows. It’s always about the show. Looking strong. Looking decisive. Looking important. Looking like he knows what he’s doing. Kind of the exact opposite of that sorry military parade he threw for his birthday.

Trump has always wanted to drop some bombs. After all, why be president if you can’t do that? His aides likely stopped him from doing it the first time around. This time, he’s loaded with incompetent sycophants. Bombs away!

But Israel had already softened up Iran when Trump sent B2 bombers in for the kill. Except that we don’t know that they actually killed Iran’s nuclear weapons program. It’s likely they wounded it badly, but no one really knows where that weapons grade uranium is except the Iranians.

Then we had all that nonsense with both countries continuing to attack each other after Trump announced a ceasefire on his social media account, which is apparently where all important presidential decisions will be announced in the near future. In all caps.

Apparently, Israel and Iran had started some military activity against each other and couldn’t just stop because Trump said so. I mean, they have some pride, too. And why waste the ammo?

Who knows? Not us. We do know this embarrassed Trump so, since he was apparently still in attack mode, he dropped an F-bomb on both countries in public, not his social media account. Used the presidential “F” word. They didn’t know what they were ##**+! doing, he said of two adversaries who have been doing it for a long time.

But the optics were bad for Trump. He had bombed Iran into peace, at least temporarily, but missiles were still flying. Don’t they read his posts?

At any rate, at this moment, which is all we have with Trump’s actions, there is apparently a ceasefire and no new war in the Middle East. That, of course, is always open to change. Trump may have blundered into a qualified success by dropping bombs on a universally hated country, since Iran is the leading supporter of terrorism on the planet.

Yes, there is that little matter of Congress not authorizing the attack and his Intelligence Director saying Iran posed no immediate threat to the U.S. because it wasn’t developing nuclear weapons. A couple of more things we know.

OK, a couple of things we don’t know: (1) How long Republicans in Congress will continue to abide this reckless, unlawful behavior and (2) how long MAGA will excuse their proclaimed “peace president” for putting their sons and daughters and maybe the world in peril just for the headlines.

Meanwhile, as he heads to a NATO meeting just full of new opportunity for grandstanding and bluster and also embarrassment, who knows where ICE will be kidnapping dark-skinned people off the streets and what program to help the elderly, the infirm, the addicted, the cash-poor will be eliminated? Where will he call out the National Guard to create chaos and fear?

You never know with Trump because he doesn’t know, or care. He’s got a flagpole to put up on the White House lawn.

It’s always about the show.

By Bob Gaydos

Sunrise at Stonehenge during the summer solstice.

It’s official. Today is the longest day of the year.

AI says so: “The longest day of summer in 2025, also known as the summer solstice, will be Friday, June 20th. This is when the Northern Hemisphere will experience its longest period of daylight and the shortest night of the year. The solstice marks the official start of astronomical summer.”

The Old Farmer’s Almanac and NASA say so: “The 2025 summer solstice falls on Friday, June 20, at 10:42 PM. ET. This marks the longest day of the year in the northern hemisphere, when the Earth’s tilt positions it closest to the Sun.”

Man, I’m embarrassed to admit this news kind of took me by surprise. I mean, every one of those 151 days since January 20 of this year has felt like the longest day of the year. I know you know what I mean.

Well, it’s late afternoon as I’m writing this and I’ve still got more than six hours for the official entry of summer and if the gods are with me, I may survive the longest day of the year without the USA going to war again.

It seems Taco Don has pulled his usual schtick and backed off from threatening to kill the leader of Iran and give Israel our bunker busting bombers to wipe out Iran’s nuclear facilities for at least “two weeks.”

That gives his staff and any Republican left in Congress with a shred of pride enough time to give our confused leader a little dose of reality to go with his bombast. Also to give delegates from France, the UK and Germany an  opportunity to meet with an Iranian delegate to consider ways to end the war between Iran and Israel without blowing up the world.

It’s similar to Trump backing off threatening 80 percent tariffs on Chinese goods and blowing up the stock market. That little insider-trading maneuver helped Donald and a few close friends make a bundle while backing off also preserved the portfolios of so-called average Americans. Supposedly we’re still talking to the Chinese, although they say we’re not.

Funny, India says Trump had nothing to do with stopping the fighting between it and Pakistan, although he says he did.

And, remember that Salvadoran native Trump’s goon squad deported to El Salvador against the judge’s orders? Trump repeatedly insisted he could not be brought back, despite repeated court orders to do so, because, well that’s a different country.

Remember? Well, Kilmar Abrego Garcia is back in Tennessee and recently appeared in court to face criminal charges for allegedly transporting migrants within the U. S. One constitutional crisis averted.

Also, the Fed chairman still has a job and we have not, despite various poorly disguised threats, invaded Panama, Greenland or Canada yet. As far as I know. But then, this is the longest day of the year, and Trump, the consummate car salesman, has yet to sell the Tesla that Elon gave him.

So who knows? Maybe I should just count my blessings, enjoy the sunshine, the air conditioning, have a little supper and find a movie to watch.

Wonder if “The Longest Day” is on Netflix.

By Bob Gaydos

Crowds did not flock to Donald Trump’s birthday parade in Washington DC on June 14.

  When the “leader“ of the free world is a racist buffoon and you’ve been pretty much calling him that for about 10 years, it can sometimes be challenging to know where to go for the daily report. Same old, same old, you know? Anyway, for me, when in doubt, go to Jimmy Cannon.

   So …

— Maybe it’s just me, but: I don’t want to go to war with Iran because BiBi Netanyahu wants to outdo Trump in the strongman competition. Especially since Trump voided the deal with Iran that prohibited it from developing weapons grade uranium for nuclear weapons. Also, Trump needs to be reminded that only Congress can declare war so he needs to calm down about evacuating Tehran and dreaming of bunker-busting bombs.

— Maybe it’s just me, but: How do they let him out in public without a leash? In Canada for the G7 Meeting, Trump said they should never have kicked Russia out, that it was all Trudeau’s fault. Russia was kicked out in 2014 for seizing Crimea from Ukraine. Trudeau became Canadian prime minister in 2015, but why bother with details? Also, Trump got his alphabet all mixed up, thinking that the UK was part of the EU. Then he gave a speech that rambled on into immigration and other topics not on the G7 agenda until cut off by the host and, having a short attention span, left the conference after one day, saying he was looking for some kind of surrender from Iran or a peace agreement or a cease-fire or something. Plus Zelensky was showing up the next day. Embarrassing.

— Maybe it’s just me, but: when an elected state official and her husband are shot and killed in their home and another elected official and his wife, in the same state and of the same political party, are shot and seriously wounded and the gunman has a hit list of political targets, all of the same political party (Democrats), when the president, a member of the other political party, is asked whether he plans to call the governor of that state (Minnesota), you know, to maybe express sympathy, promise aggressive legal action and decry politically motivated violence of any kind against any party, even though the governor actually ran as the vice presidential candidate on the ticket opposing said president, I do not expect the president to say he “may” call the governor (Tim Walz), then add, “but he’s a terrible governor.” I really do not expect that, but then, see “racist buffoon” reference above.

— Maybe it’s just me, but: I’m old school enough to think that when a United States senator (Alex Padilla) is roughed up by federal agents, thrown to the ground and handcuffed just because he tried to ask a question of a cabinet official at a public meeting, the president, when asked about it, expresses concern and maybe even dismay and promises to look into the incident immediately. I don’t expect said president to say, “He’s new. He looks illegal.”

— Maybe it’s just me, but: How about that parade, huh? Creaky old tanks, no dress uniforms, antiwar protest songs, commercial sponsors, nobody watching except for a few people paid to be there and soldiers marching clearly out of step. Do you know how hard it is, when you are drilled from day one in the army to march uniformly in step (Hut, two, three, four! Your left, boom, your left, boom.) to purposely “march” out of step? Yet the troops chosen for the Trump birthday parade on Flag Day managed to do just that. They should get a medal. If he hadn’t nodded off he might’ve noticed. Of course he did find time to sign some souvenir flags, breaking protocol and the law in the process because he has to put his brand on everything. Pete Hegseth looked like he was dying for a drink. Marco Rubio just looked like he was dying. Ivanka didn’t bother to show up for daddy‘s birthday. The rest of America, millions of people, held their own parties in towns, villages and cities to let him know what they thought of him and his crew. Not much.

— Maybe it’s just me, but: When the news is all-Trump all the time, there’s a real temptation to ignore professional training and just go ahead and bury the lead. 

By Bob Gaydos

   “They’re not out there.”

    The little green men.

    The flying saucers.

    The UAPs.

    The UFOs.

    The whatever-they-are that-move-faster-than possible.

     Trust us. It’s one big game of phone tag encouraged by movies, TV and conspiracy theorists. Nothing happening. Nothing covered up. Nothing being reverse engineered. Get on with your day. That is all.

       The above is the gist of a 67-page report issued recently by the Defense Department’s All-Domain Anomaly Resolution Office, entitled “Report on the Historical Record of U.S. Government Involvement with Unidentified Anomalous Phenomena.”

    To wit: Nothing out there. Nothing in some desert in New Mexico. The AARO, given full funding by Congress to do its job, concluded that most sitings were simply “misidentification” and, contrary to recent whistleblower claims, it “found no empirical evidence for claims that the USG and private companies have been reverse-engineering extraterrestrial technology.”

     Well … not so fast. I’m not a UFO fanatic or a conspiracy theorist, but I do believe the odds favor some form of life elsewhere in the universe and I know it’s risky business blindly accepting a report by a government agency summarily dismissing allegations against other segments of the same department.

   Also, I know that there were no weapons of mass destruction buried in Iraq, the U.S. did secretly buy weapons from Iran to arm Nicaraguan rebels and it’s still a bit sketchy on whether North Vietnamese ships really attacked U.S. Navy warships in the Gulf of Tonkin, thrusting the U.S. fully into the war in Vietnam.

    The point? The Defense Department investigating the Defense Department on a matter of wide public interest and controversy is probably not the best way to resolve long-standing questions.

      The mere fact that the government stopped referring to UFOs as UFOs and started calling them UAPs, unidentified aerial phenomena, suggests an effort to distance from easier public understanding of the topic. Give it a serious sounding name, suggesting all the other UFO stuff is just Hollywood making money. Most of the world will probably still refer to the balloons, satellites and other objects as UFOs, regardless.

     The report was requested by Congress after numerous reports by Navy pilots and other military personnel regarding the sighting of strange objects in the sky and reports from former Defense Department employees of some technology, not of this planet, being secretly reverse-engineered by  the government and private companies.

     A congressional committee held a closed-door meeting with the inspector general of the Intelligence community on such reports a while back and several members emerged thinking that, at the very least, the reports were credible enough for further investigation.

      AARO was given full funding by Congress to do so, Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand, of New York, being one of the senators pushing for the full funding. Haven’t heard any response from the senator yet to the AARO report.

       Most of the mainstream media simply reported the facts straight out of the report as presented: No UFOs, no little green men, nothing being hidden, ever, in the desert, or anywhere else regarding alien life. Just people repeating the same stories to each other, misidentified stuff, some references to other secret government programs and, well, maybe a few things there’s too little information on to draw a conclusion.

     Not good enough. Many of the recent reports, based on advanced technology, were made by credible witnesses. In fact, so were some of the older reports, many of which described objects similar to recent reports. Some older reports apparently were not even included in the AARO report.

   Instead of the Executive Department investigating the Executive Department, Congress, as an equal member of government, the funding member, should do so. There are reports that legislation is being prepared for just that purpose.

      People are unlikely to stop believing in UFOS or at least the possibility of them, especially when they’re dismissed as engaging in a game of phone tag. In fact, that’s the kind of response some bad Hollywood scriptwriters would come up with  

                                     ******

PS: The AARO report is unlikely to dampen the annual UFO parade and celebration in the Hamlet of Pine Bush in upstate New York. The UFO capital of the Northeast will hold its annual festivities June 1 and, yes, there will be little and big green men, robots, other strange creatures, lots of good food, music, goods to be bought and fun to be had. There will also be some serious discussion by serious people about UAPs, etc. I’d venture to say the AARO report will come up. A fun day for believers, non-believers and everyone in-between. Maybe Senator Gillibrand will stop by.

rjgaydos@gmail.com

By Bob Gaydos

Safe, but useless for stuffy noses. RJ Photography

   A quick stream through news you may have missed, starting with, of all places, the FDA, a government agency notoriously reluctant to make waves, much less headlines, but which nonetheless issued a statement (1.) informing all Americans with stuffy noses that the pill or liquid they’re taking to relieve the congestion doesn’t work, in fact (2.) probably never has worked, even though it’s been used for 75 years, but don’t worry, it’s still safe to take if, say, you have a headache and can’t figure a cheaper way to deal with that or just hate to throw stuff out, even if it doesn’t work because, after all, (3.) the FDA hasn’t told the drug companies to take it off the shelves because it contains phenylephrine as its decongestant-fighting ingredient and an advisory group formed by the agency voted unanimously that (4.) tests show the stuff doesn’t decongest any noses when in pill or liquid form because it doesn’t reach the affected area, which is actually what another advisory group told the FDA  about phenylephrine in 2007, but the FDA (see notoriously reluctant to make waves) decided to let it remain on the shelves because, well, it’s apparently safe, just not useful as a decongestant, and so now the agency will (5.) solicit public input on the question before deciding whether to pull the products off the shelves and replace them with something that works, but not likely (6.)  pseudoephedrine, which was moved behind pharmacy counters in 2006, by law, because pseudoephedrine (as millions of viewers of “Breaking Bad” and “Better Call Saul,” learned) can be processed into methamphetamine and America was fighting a war on drugs and, yes, (7.) pseudoephedrine is still available without a prescription and meth is somehow still being made, but let’s not confuse the issue with facts because the FDA still has to go through the lengthy process of determining whether to remove these oral decongestants from the market and (8.) wants to know what you think (assuming you don’t want to simply toss the pills and liquids and switch to nasal sprays, which are effective) and so we’ll have to wait and in the meantime (9.) consider a recent deal the Biden administration made with the government of Iran to free five Americans who were being held as spies in exchange for the release by the U.S. of five Iranians (10.) and (follow the bouncing ball here) unfreezing of $6 billion in Iranian assets (oil money) being held in a bank in the Republic of Korea (the good guys) to be transferred to a bank in Qatar (not sure), where it can only be (12.) withdrawn to be used for things like food, medicine and other humanitarian needs Iran has apparently been struggling to provide, but not (13.) for weapons, all of which (14.) prompted Republicans in America to scream about the U. S. not paying ransom money, even though it was technically Iran’s money, but critics argued it could free up other Iranian money to pay for weaponry, etc., although Republicans, and for that matter no one else, has ever offered a better, non-hostile way to free Americans being held in hostile countries, which would seem to be a more serious problem than that which House Speaker Kevin McCarthy should face in (15.) fulfilling that body’s duty to provide a budget for the government on time so that it can function, since his party controls the House where the spending bills originate and also since McCarthy had already (16.) reached an agreement with President Biden about a budget bill to avoid a government shutdown, none of which matters to the rowdy kids of the Freedom Caucus in the Republican Party, who don’t seem to care about shutting down the government, affecting millions of Americans, and (17.) are more interested in trying to find any evidence that would justify an impeachment investigation into Biden, rather than presenting any evidence that would justify an investigation, which leaves McCarthy looking again, (18.) like the hapless fool he is, begging and pleading and cajoling a group of spoiled brats to act like grown-ups, not like rowdy teenagers making out in the theater, which is the signal to (19.) cue in Rep. Lauren Bobert, a prominent member of the Freedom Caucus, loudly talking and singing, arguing with other audience members, vaping, groping, being groped by (oops!) the owner of a gay club that offers drag entertainers and ultimately being escorted out of a live performance of “Beetlejuice” at the Denver Center for the Performing Arts, which (20.) had some more responsible members of the GOP (there are one or two) reaching for the Sudafed or DayQuil because at least the acetaminophen in them still works, (21.). Or so the FDA tells us.

rjgaydos@gmail.com

By Bob Gaydos

Former hostages pass through Highland Mills on their way to West Point via motorcade. They had just landed at Stewart Airport in New Windsor, N.Y., their first foot on American soil after 444 days held hostage in Iran.
Times Herald-Record photo

Catching up with other news while on Trump indictment watch. And with a deep bow to the late, great Jimmy Cannon.

— Maybe it’s just me, but: I have no trouble believing reports that supporters of Ronald Reagan met secretly with officials of the Iranian regime before the 1980 presidential election to convince them not to agree to a deal with President Jimmy Carter on releasing 52 American hostages because his opponent — Reagan — would give them a better deal. It’s tradition for the GOP. Richard Nixon had a team of “dirty tricks” specialists working when he was in the White House. The treachery worked. Reagan won. A sad footnote to a legacy of service as Carter, 96, spends his final days in hospice. He deserved better.

— Maybe it’s just me, but: I can’t let Nikki Haley skate by without noting that she has added ageism to the Republican political dialogue to go along with racism, anti-Semitism, anti-LGBTQ and anti-education language. Haley, in announcing her candidacy for the GOP nomination for president, called for mental competency tests for federal officials more than 75 years old. Of course, President Biden (80), who would easily pass such a test, and Donald Trump (76), who would surely fail one, are both over 75. So are 16 senators and 36 members of the House of Representatives. Haley backed off on the top job, obviously not wanting to anger Trump, but said: “I think you look at Congress. Look at all the members of Congress. You have to start doing this for our elected officials. When people send someone to Washington, they need to know they’re at the top of their game.”    Here are some current Republican members of Congress, all under 75 years of age: Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, Marjorie Taylor-Greene, Jim Jordan, Ronny Jackson (the ex-Navy doctor who said Trump was in great physical shape) and Paul Gosar. Former members include Louie Gohmert and Devin Nunes. The top of their game? They couldn’t find “competency “in a dictionary.

— Maybe it’s just me, but: Every time I start to think maybe we’re not approaching the end of civilization as we’ve known it, someone comes up with a TV show to prove me wrong. This one is called “Power Slap.” Calling itself “the world’s premier slap fighting organization,” it is actually licensed and sanctioned by the Nevada State Athletic Commission. Not surprising. In Power Slap, competitors stand on opposite sides of a lectern and, yes, take turns slapping the snot out of each other, one slap at a time, until someone “wins.” That’s it. That’s entertainment. Or maybe it’s a 21st Century version of Darwin’s survival of the fittest.

— Maybe it’s just me, but: Let’s call it The End of the World Part II.  A Tallahassee, Florida charter school principal was forced to resign after a parent complained that sixth graders were exposed to “pornography” during a Renaissance art lesson that included Michelangelo’s “David” sculpture. Yes, the masterpiece that was originally commissioned to be placed in the Cathedral of Florence, is porn in a school in Florida, where any working brain cells apparently go to die, courtesy Ron DeSantis, governor.

   — Back to Trump indictment watch.

rjgaydos@gmail.com

Bob Gaydos is writer-in-residence at zestoforange.com.

By Bob Gaydos 

Umberto’s Clam House, where Joey Gallo met his demise.

    It had all the subtlety of a mob hit.

     The Don: “So what’s the story with this Soleimani? Why’s he still around acting like a big shot, messing around in our territory? He should show some respect.”

     Old Soldier: “Well, Don, when you tore up that treaty with his boss, this guy started acting like that territory was all fair game for him. I mean, he was always a pain in the ass, causing trouble everywhere.”

      Don: “How come nobody set him straight?”

      Old Soldier: “It ain’t that simple. His boss let’s him take care of business how he sees fit and his guys are really loyal. They’ve also been through lots of family wars and, to tell you the truth, I think they like hitting the mattresses and blowing people up. The Don before you felt it was more important to make the family stronger, expand its influence and not lose any more young soldiers. He kept an eye on Soleimani and warned his boss not to get too greedy. But this guy’s ambitious and a little reckless, y’know? Difficult. Kinda like Joey Gallo was.”

      Don: “Yeah. Was.”

      Old Soldier: “Whaddya mean?”

     Don: “I hear this guy likes to hang out at Amani’s Falafel House in Baghdad.”

      Old Soldier: “Yeah. Kinda on the QT, though.”

      Don: “Maybe we should surprise him.”

      Old Soldier: Nods.

      Don: “I hear you got a new house painter.”

      Old Soldier: “Yeah. Irishman, name of Droghn.”

     Don: “Ask him if he likes falafel pita. Tell him it’s my favorite. It ain’t, but he don’t have to know.”

      Old Soldier: “You sure, boss?”

     Don: “Yeah. The old Don was too soft. He let people walk all over him. The Korean boss, the Chinese. The only ones he ever gave grief was the Russians and they’re our best allies. We have to let our people know that nobody pushes Don around. They’ll go to the mattresses gladly for me. I’ll be at the golf club if you need me.”

                                              * *.*

       In the world of Donald Trump, repercussions don’t matter if they don’t impact on you directly. Foreign policy (Iran) is like domestic policy (health care) or campaigning — a matter of the moment. Instinct. Ego. It’s all personal. Learned at the elbow of Roy Cohn. Hit ‘em hard. Show them you’re tough. Be nasty. It’s just business. Ignore the doubters. Don’t listen to the “worriers.” Be a warrior. Yeah, others may suffer, but you’ll look strong. That’s the main thing. You pulled the trigger when the other Dons were too scared. You showed them who’s boss.          

      Just like in the movies.

rjgaydos@gmail.com