By Bob Gaydos

J.D. Vance never had a chance.

From Budapest to Islamabad,

the cards were stacked

in advance.

 

He campaigned for Viktor Orban,

a fool’s errand to be sure.

Bringing Trump’s blessing to a similar man

whose people had had more than enough.

“It takes one to know one!” cried the Hungarians.

Their anger was pure, their answer tough.

“Be gone, oh messenger of gloom.

And Orban, go to your room.”

 

Onward pressed Vance,

with a war to be won or at least settled or ended … or somethinged.

Off to Pakistan to meet

with some men from Iran.

As a writer of fiction parading as truth,

he seemed the perfect man.

Forsooth!

 

But the men from Iran refused to surrender.

This meeting would be no war ender.

They stuck to their guns, their missiles, their drones

and their Strait of Hormuz.

They were winning a war

Vance said they were s’posed to lose.

 

What to do? What to do?

Jared, what say you?

Your father-in-law won’t be pleased

if the fire hasn’t been ceased.

Nothing. … Nothing?

After a long day of talking,

the negotiations

officially ceased.

 

Daunted but unbowed by his lack

of good news,

J.D. returned home …

to a chorus of boos.

From, of all people, the Catholics, his adopted faith brethren.

They were saying he should go to a place

that wasn’t called Heaven.

It seems they were angry

that this eyelinered mope

had rubber-stamped Trump in threatening …

The Pope!

 

Ex-communicate this sinner! The social media sites clamored!

A hillbilly phony pretending again!

They were not enamored.

 

And so it went for J.D.,

a lost weekend

with no sleep.

For the Bible says,

and as he should know:

Whatever the dateline,

You shall reap as you sow.

By Bob Gaydos

 “First you say you do and then you don’t.

   Then you say you will and then you won’t.

    You’re undecided now, so what are you gonna do?”

     Those are the lyrics to a song that was popular in the ‘40s and ‘50s, recorded by, among others, Ella Fitzgerald and the Ames Brothers.

       A simple song for a simpler time. Today, the song’s predicament remains the same. Someone has extreme difficulty making up his or her mind. But there is a heightened urgency to a need for the answer and growing frustration with those who can’t provide it.

        Yeah, we’re talking about those “undecided” voters who watched the recent debate between Donald Trump and Kamala Harris and still can’t figure out who they want to be President of the United States.

        Really?

        Harris was cool, calm and confident, exactly what one would hope of the current vice president of the United States, also a former senator and prosecutor. She spoke from experience and with compassion. She mostly didn’t try to evade questions and definitely didn’t make stuff up.

   Trump?

    On abortion: “They’re executing newborn babies.”

    Out of the blue: “They’re performing transgender operations on illegal aliens in prison.”

     Immigration: “In Springfield, they’re eating the dogs, the people that came in (Haitian immigrants). They’re eating the cats. They’re eating — they’re eating the pets of the people that live there.”

     On replacing Obamacare: Moderator (frustrated) : “So just yes or no. You do have a plan?

      Trump: “I have concepts of a plan.”

       The rest was mostly stream-of-consciousness blaming of immigrants for imagined increases in crime rates, defensiveness over the size of crowds at his rallies, mumbo jumbo about tariffs and praise for the two most dangerous leaders in Europe, Russia’s Vladimir Putin and Hungary’s Viktor Orban. Also a lot of angry faces.

        And yet, some people described by various media outlets as “undecided voters” in a very close contest, said they still haven’t decided which of the candidates they would like to hold the most powerful office on the planet. 

        Whew…. I don’t know who these people are but, you know what, I don’t believe some of them and, in these changing times, the rest will just have to change their tune and, as Paul Simon sang, “Get on the bus, Gus,” and set themselves free with President Kamala Harris.   

rjgaydos@gmail.com