By Bob Gaydos

Donald Trump speaks behind bulletproof glass during a campaign rally at Arnold Palmer Regional Airport in Latrobe, Pennsylvania. (AFP via Getty Images)

  (Deep sigh.)

     My fellow Americans, the Trump era in politics began with Stormy Daniels, a porn star, talking about the size of then-presidential candidate Donald Trump’s putter. (He’s an avid golfer, as you know.). Eight years later, the candidate himself, Trump, is talking about the size of the golfing legend Arnold Palmer’s driver.

     No, you’re right, this has nothing to do with golf. 

     And before I go any further, I want to extend my sincere apologies to David Bernstein, my first editor (and publisher) at the Binghamton (N.Y.) Sun-Bulletin, and Donald Koster, my journalism professor at Adelphi College in Garden City (N.Y.), for resorting to such snarky symbolism to refer to male genitalia. You taught me better. But unfortunately, that’s where we are today in journalism and in life in general. There are no apparent rules. F bombs abound. Besides, the topic never came up about what to do when a political candidate started talking about someone’s penis at a public political rally.

     Yes, that’s where we are, people, courtesy of the aforementioned Donald Trump, convicted of 34 felonies in trying to stop Ms. Daniels from telling the world about his extramarital golf game and awaiting sentencing on the convictions. Trump was also found liable, in a civil trial, for sexually assaulting a woman in a dressing room at a Manhattan department store. He was ordered to pay her $85 million for the assault and defaming her when she accused him. Plus there’s the matter of attempting a coup when he lost his bid for reelection in 2020.

       Back to golf. Trump was talking about Palmer because the rally was in Latrobe, Pa., the late golfer’s hometown. What better reason to muse about the size of Palmer’s penis. What better way to make your supporters feel good about themselves, laugh and pat you on the back when you come in from recess? Yes, they laughed and for good measure also tossed the word s—t out at Trump’s opponent, Kamala Harris. At his urging of course.

      This coarse intersection of the presidential campaign highlights again the absolute depths to which the Republican Party has sunk, with no leader willing or able to step forward and point out that, not only does their leader and presidential candidate have no morals, he is also losing his mind. What Trump did in Latrobe and continues to do everywhere he appears, wandering off into a verbal mishmash fantasyland, accentuated by lies and threats, is not the behavior of a competent adult, never mind someone who is capable of leading the most powerful country in the world.

        What will it take for someone, some family member or party leader to step up to say Trump must step aside for the good of the party and the country? So far, only Liz Cheney has shown those kind of, yes, cajones.

         A day after Trump (apparently no longer interested in talking about tariffs, immigration or abortion) reminisced about Arnold Palmer’s manly presence in the clubhouse shower, the Republican speaker of the House of Representatives was interviewed on CNN by Jake Tapper.

        The speaker dismissed questions about Trump’s violent rhetoric about “the enemy within” and threats to use the military against his political opponents, specifically naming Nancy Pelosi and Adam Schaffer. Then Tapper asked, “Is this really the closing message you want voters to hear from Donald Trump, stories about Arnold Palmer’s penis?”

        Avoidance.

        Tapper persisted. “I’m sure that you think that a policy debate would be better than a personality debate. But if President Biden had gone on stage and spoke about the size of a pro golfer’s penis, I think you would be on this show right now saying you were shocked and appalled and you would suggest it was evidence of his cognitive decline.”

        The speaker, agitated: “Don’t say it again!”

        “We don’t have to say it. I get it.” Flustered: “There’s lines in a rally – when president Trump is at a rally, sometimes you’ll speak for two straight hours. You’re questioning his stamina, his mental acuity. Joe Biden couldn’t do that for five minutes. That’s how you started this segment. You said, what if Biden was in a rally like that? He couldn’t fill the room, Donald Trump does.”

         That’s how the Speaker of the House, second in line to the presidency and supposedly a leader of the Republican Party, responded to questions about his party’s presidential candidate riffing at a campaign rally about the size of Arnold Palmer’s … you know … don’t say it.

          I hesitate to point out, but, what the heck, the embarrassed speaker is a conservative Evangelical Christian from Louisiana with the unfortunate last name “Johnson.”

          (Sigh.) Sorry, David. Sorry, Professor Koster.

          God bless America. Vote for Kamala Harris.

                                        ***

(David Bernstein, before owning The Sun-Bulletin in Binghamton, established the Middletown Daily Record, the first offset daily in the country, in 1956. It later became the Times Herald-Record in Middletown, N.Y. I worked there for 29 years, including 23 as editorial page editor. Donald Koster was a member of the Adelphi College English Department in the 1960s. I squeaked through as an English major. Adelphi became a university in 1964, the year after I graduated.)

By Bob Gaydos

Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky and Republican presidential nominee, former U.S. President Donald Trump, shake hands during a meeting in New York City.

    Two reality TV stars met in New York last week to engage in international diplomacy in conjunction with the annual meeting of the United Nations General Assembly. The ironies abounded but were pretty much ignored (or just missed) by much of the so-called mainstream media.

      Start with the fact that both men, political novices, were elected president of their homelands by virtue of the popularity of television shows in which they starred.

      Donald Trump rode the false image created of him as a shrewd businessman on “The Apprentice” all the way to the White House. The real-life baron of bankruptcy court was going to make America great again.

      Volodymyr Zelensky parlayed his TV portrayal of a sincere teacher turned novice president determined to clean up corruption in Ukraine into the real president’s job in Kiev.

      You really can’t make this stuff up.

       Zelensky’s TV show, “Servant of the People,” was not technically a reality show, but its satire was aimed directly at the reality of life in Ukraine at the time. It ran for three years and catapulted the actor to the international stage. Let’s see if he can really clear up the corruption.

       The plot for both has turned deadly serious the past four years. That’s what brought the two men — one ex-president trying to regain power, one current president trying to preserve his country — together in New York.

       Trump, whose presidency was punctuated by a tax cut for wealthy Americans, a series of unkept promises (the Wall, the infrastructure, health care) and the deaths of more than 400,000 Americans due to his lack of a policy to deal with the Covid virus, is desperately trying to get re-elected president to stay out of prison.

     To refresh your memory: After leaving office in 2021, he was indicted on 88 felony charges, ranging from trying to overturn the legitimate results of the 2020 election to unlawful possession of classified government documents and falsifying documents in connection with a hush money scheme to cover up an affair with a porn star that could have derailed his 2016 run for president. He has been convicted of 34 felonies in connection with that case in New York and sentencing is scheduled for Nov. 26.

     If he is elected president, he undoubtedly will try to use the recently created presidential immunity ruling by the Supreme Court to get rid of the conviction, even though he wasn’t president when he committed the crimes. Hey, what’s the point of having power if you can’t appoint judges to save your behind.

      Zelinsky, of course, has been waging a war, not primarily with corruption, but with Russia, which invaded Ukraine in 2022. That was the point of his New York meeting with Trump.

      Much as he undoubtedly doesn’t respect Trump, Zelinsky knows that, if by chance, Trump is elected president again, Ukraine’s future in the war could change dramatically. Trump has made no secret of his infatuation with Russian Premier Vladimir Putin. Trump has also questioned United States weapons and funding in support of Ukraine and he has also cast doubt on future U.S. support for NATO, which has been a strong supporter of Ukraine in the war. 

         And let’s not forget that one of two impeachments of Trump when he was president involved his effort to get Zelinsky to fabricate corruption evidence against Hunter and Joe Biden in connection with Hunter’s business dealings in Ukraine. The aim was to help Trump’s presidential run against Joe, who is Hunter’s father. Trump threatened to withhold U.S. weapons aid to Ukraine, which was fighting Russian separatists in eastern Ukraine, if Zelinsky did not cooperate. Zelinsky stayed mum. A Republican Senate acquitted Trump.

      Despite this sketchy history, Zelinsky, as president of Ukraine, had to make an effort in New York with Trump, just in case. 

      What did that effort produce? Trump’s version of another popular American TV show: “Let’s Make a Deal.”

     After meeting with the Ukrainian president for 40 minutes, the ever-transactional Trump told Fox News, “We both want to see this end, and we both want to see a fair deal made. … The president wants it to end, and he wants it to end as quickly as possible. He wants a fair transaction to take place.”

    What kind of fair transaction? Earlier in the week, Trump described Ukraine as “demolished” and said, “Any deal — the worst deal — would’ve been better than what we have now. If they made a bad deal, it would’ve been much better. They would’ve given up a little bit and everybody would be living and every building would be built and every tower would be aging for another 2,000 years.”

    In other words, give Putin the territory Russia now illegally occupies in Ukraine and count your blessings. Fair deal.

      After his meeting with Trump, Zelinsky had a somewhat different take on the situation: “We need to do everything to pressure him (Putin) to stop this war. He is in our territory. That’s most important to understand. He is in our territory.”

    Trump (not understanding):  “We (Zelinsky and Trump) have a very good relationship. And I also have a very good relationship, as you know, with President Putin. And if we win, I think we’re going to get it resolved very quickly.” (See: The Wall, infrastructure, health care … )

       Zelensky: “I hope we have more good relations between us.”       

       Trump: “But, you know, it takes two to tango.”

        Right. … Flashback to 2018 when President Trump and Premier Putin had a private tete-a-fete at their Helsinki summit meeting and Putin exited the room with a big grin and shoulders all puffed up and Trump came out slumped over, looking like a scared little puppy dog. Remember?

           Yeah. It’s not a reality TV show, but rather, a movie: “The Manchurian Candidate.” But Trump still has the starring role.