By Gretchen Gibbs

Hey, April 1 and it’s snowing!  God’s little April Fools’ Day joke!

The real joke, though, is that it’s Opening Day for the Mets. Other teams, like the Yankees, start on March 31, but not the Bad Luck Mets. Of course, if you wanted luck, why would you pick a goofy little doofus for a mascot. Mr. Met, with his garish orange and blue costume and his retarded smiley face, tells you all you need to know about how well the team will do.

The main problem with the Mets is that they’ve spent a fortune on bad deals and thrown their money to the wind. Of all the teams in both leagues, they’ve paid the second highest total in salaries, the Yankees being first of course. Some Net blogger, ObamaWood, regressed relative team success on the amount of money spent and rates the Mets 30^th out of 30 teams in terms of bang for the buck. Over $150 million and the last two years they’ve played about .500 ball. 

Some examples. The organization recently had to get rid of Oliver Perez, a pitcher who couldn’t get the ball over the plate, and Luis Castillo, a second base player who  hit around .200. They both had  multi-million dollar, multi-year contracts, so they’re gone but the Mets are still paying them.  

Last year they paid a fortune for Jason Bay, who was a star hitter with the Red Sox. For the Mets he did nothing and now he’s injured. That money seems down the drain.

Then there are the multi-million dollar contract players who were injured last year and look like they’re never going to recover fully. Carlos Beltran can still hit but he can only hobble around the bases, and he’ll never be the fielder he was before. Johan Santana was one of the great pitchers of the current age, but last September he injured his shoulder badly, and it looks like he’ll never be able to pitch again, at least not like he did.

Not only did the organization make poor bets, some of which could not have been predicted, but now the owners are being investigated for their ties to Bernie Madoff.

There were other problems last year besides bad investments. The Mets closer, K-Rod, Francisco Rodriguez, blew a game, and then assaulted his girlfriend’s father. Great publicity for a team thought by other teams to be arrogant. Hey, you have to have a little attitude to come from New York.

Anyway, this spring, there’s poverty. No new big players. There’s a few newbies, mainly from the minors, mainly making the minimum salary for the majors. 

Yet here we are, April 1. The weather is raw, the game’s away. The team is hopeless, yet still I hope. I’m not home, but I’ve got the DVR set to record the game. I remind myself that last year the one Met hero was R.A. Dickey, a 36-year old knuckle ball pitcher who played in the minors most of his career. Maybe the team can go back to what they were back in 1973, short on money, long on heart, when Tug McGraw said “Ya gotta believe,” and everybody did. I’m setting myself up to be an April fool, and I don’t care.

P.S.  They lost that opening day game.

By Jeffrey Page
Rush Limbaugh and his clones would have you believe that the only Americans not outraged over public workers’ salaries and benefits are those very same public workers. Limbaugh spends three hours a day railing on and on and has nothing positive to say about the quality of the work these people do.

Of all people paid by taxpayers, Limbaugh focuses on the nation’s teachers and their unions. Teachers are pretty lousy at their jobs, he says with nauseating regularity. Of course, he doesn’t know what he’s talking about, but that’s never stopped him. Nonetheless, since there is a fringe of the nut-right that insists on seeing President Obama’s birth certificate, I demand to see Limbaugh’s report cards. Anyone as vicious as Limbaugh on the subject of teachers must have had a terrible first few years in school.

Show it or shut up, Limbaugh.

To listen to these radio observers you’d think that every school budget is an attack on middle class taxpayers and that every public sector worker is a schnorer (a Yiddish word, hard to translate, but basically an individual wishing something for nothing).

Do Limbaugh and the others ever actually venture out of the studio to do some basic reporting? Did any of them actually visit a classroom to observe what happens there? If they have, I haven’t heard about it. If they think they could last a day trying to teach a class of 20 fidgety first graders how to read, they’re mistaken because kids don’t respond to blowhards. You don’t order a kid to learn. You take your time and teach her.

Limbaugh, fulminating about public salaries is a joke. Cops, librarians, road crews and firefighters overpaid? Wasn’t it Rush Limbaugh who signed a contract for $400 million through 2008? Sure, he gets paid with private money, but spews his pollution five days a week on airwaves owned by the people.

As it turns out, he may not be speaking for all the people he thinks he represents.

I came across a most provocative headline in the Times Herald-Record a few days ago: “Chester district’s residents keen to save teachers, staff.”

The reporter noted that the message from residents to school board members was: Save our teachers, staff and principal. One woman in the audience wondered why an administrative position has to be cut. Though the Chester district is looking at the fangs of a $1.3 million reduction in state aid, the Record reported that many people at the meeting were willing to tough it out. After discussion of a 6 percent increase in the tax levy, one woman asked what would be lost with an increase of 8 percent.

The paper quoted a man who said an increase of 12 percent would cost taxpayers about $50 a month and indicated he could accept that. Of course an additional $600 a year is a steep hike for people on fixed incomes, but the startling thing about the meeting and the Record’s story was that, faced with cuts that will result in a lesser education for their children, some residents would be willing to pay the needed money.

A few weeks before that story, I was surprised to hear a report about a poll showing that most of the people of Wisconsin opposed the controversial new law (on hold by court order for now) that strips public sector workers of their right to bargain collectively. This, despite all the slanders heaped upon the state and local employees in Wisconsin. I suspect the meaning of this is not more complicated than an understanding that the people are smarter than the voices on the radio.

Have you had positive experiences with public workers? Care to share them with Zest readers? Send them along in the reply-box just below.

Note to Zest Readers: I wondered as I wrote this column if I had devoted entirely too much space to Rush Limbaugh. I checked and discovered I’ve only mentioned him in four pieces since April 2009, when Zest of Orange began. Still, Limbaugh is a never changing tune that I no longer wish to whistle. So, aside from the truly extraordinary, this is my last piece about him.

Jeff can be reached at jeffrey@zestoforange.com

At the Governor's Mansion.

By Bob Gaydos

By way of nothing else save the fact that you never know what little gifts life has for you if you don’t pay attention, I offer this brief exchange between two of my least favorite people in the world, Glenn Beck and Bill O’Reilly. Beck was on O’Reilly’s TV show the other day, talking about the latest Fox News darling, Donald Trump, who has launched a campaign for president that is so outrageous and phony even Beck can’t stand it. In brief, Trump has spent the past week telling anyone who will listen that he’s not sure President Obama is a natural-born American and, what’s more, he suspects the president may be a Muslim. Donald … Donald … Donald.

Beck told O’Reilly: “The last thing the country needs is a showboat … I would hope we could get serious candidates who could shake things up by not saying provocative things, just by stating the truth of what’s going on.”

Honest, that’s what he said.

But wait. Here’s O’Reilly’s response: “But then you and I would be off the air, because we’re provocateurs. We do that every day.”

There is a god somewhere. Now if only someone can explain irony to Fox News listeners.

* * *

The rest of this blog amounts to an exercise in self-reflection that could also be called ego-stroking. Nonetheless, I will not be deterred, especially at these prices.

It started last week when I was writing about a chance meeting I had with then-Senate candidate Geraldine Ferraro at the Ulster County Fair (it’s in the archives if you’re interested). I began recalling other “famous” persons I had met and in what circumstances. Be honest. We all do it, journalists do it maybe more than others because our work offers more opportunities to do so than a lot of other jobs.

Anyway, after deciding that the ego thing didn’t matter — because what was my ego in the grand scheme of things — and rationalizing that it might be good for my sons to get some sense of where my life had taken me, I started my list. Basic ground rules: It must have been an actual meeting, meaning words were exchanged, hands possibly shaken, and local politicians don‘t count except for members of Congress. You need a line somewhere.

The closest I ever came to meeting Glenn Beck was standing around a piano with a bunch of editors and Cal Thomas, singing what were probably old show tunes. I think it was in Philadelphia, but don’t hold me to that. Thomas was Beck before Beck ever thought of being Beck. And brighter. He is an evangelical Christian, a former vice president of the Moral Majority, a longtime syndicated columnist and a regular contributor to the Fox follies. Also, as I recall, a passable baritone with a good sense of humor and, at one time, capable of acknowledging nonsense within his own ranks. On the other side of the aisle, there was the incomparable Pete Hamill and in the middle, Newsweek’s Howard Fineman, both of whom came to Middletown.

The world of sports offered encounters with Dallas quarterback Roger Staubach, boxer/TV personality Rocky Graziano (“Somebody Up There Likes Me”), Orioles pitcher Jim Palmer (naked in a whirlpool), champ Floyd Patterson (eating in a restaurant in New Paltz), columnist Milton Richman and, all too briefly, Jackie Robinson (a legitimate thrill).

In the world of entertainment there was the very tall Harry Belafonte at the Concord, the very drunk Clancy Brothers (around a bar after hours in Binghamton), Western author Larry McMurtry, actor Victor Arnold (the hit man in the original “Shaft”) and, in a Woodstock art gallery, an also very tall Henny Youngman (“Take my card, please.”)

Not surprisingly, there are a bunch of political figures on my list, starting with Ferraro’s running mate, former Vice President Walter Mondale (a hello-how-are-ya in Minneapolis). There are the New York governors, of course: The imperial Nelson Rockefeller (he of the middle finger salute), the lanky George Pataki from Peekskill, and the Cuomos — the senior, Mario, who could hold a room hostage for hours, and junior, Andrew, when he was attorney general and when he was messing up the gubernatorial campaign of H. Carl McCall. Also, the other also-rans: Mayor Ed Koch, Tom (Who?) Golisano, Pierre (the Record staff are the rudest people I have ever encountered) Rinfret, Andrew (I don’t stand a Chance) O’Rourke, Howard Samuels (a very cool customer), and Arthur (Hey, I was once a Supreme Court justice) Goldberg. Throw in Marvin Mandel in Maryland and Anne Richards in an elevator in Fort Worth. And of course, a special place is reserved in my heart for Eliot Spitzer, the dumbest smart politician I ever met.

Among senators, D. Patrick Moynihan held court in Goshen and Chuck Schumer showed up seemingly for breakfast every day. Local boy- made-good Howard Mills was the sacrificial lamb for the GOP against Schumer, but Mills always returned phone calls. Senator Hillary never did deign to grace us with her presence, but Rick Lazio was thrilled to stop by for a lengthy chat.

And, giving them their due, Congressmen Ben Gilman, Matt McHugh, Howard Robison, Maurice Hinchey, John Hall (who founded the rock group Orleans and also qualifies as an entertainer) and Congresswoman Sue Kelly, who famously and entertainingly imploded during an interview with the Record.

Among civil rights figures, Jesse Jackson towers above the rest, literally and figuratively, but Floyd McKissick, national director of CORE, was more accessible at Gentleman Joe’s bar in Binghamton.

Oddly enough, perhaps the most famous person I ever had a meaningful conversation with is someone whose name almost nobody recognized, and most probably still don’t know to this day: Norma McCorvey. McCorvey is better known as Jane Roe of the Roe v Wade Supreme Court decision that confirmed a woman’s right to choose abortion.

When I met Norma, she had not only changed from pro-choice to pro-life on abortion, but had joined the Roman Catholic Church and announced she was no longer a lesbian. Life has a way offering surprises.

OK, wrapping it up. Mario Cuomo is easily the most magnetic, imposing famous person I ever met. He could talk about anything at all, intelligently and engagingly, at length. He once made his staff and TH-R editors sit through a two-and-half- hour meeting while lunch waited invitingly in an adjoining room. No one had the guts to stop him. He should have run for president.

But for sheer, humble, who-is-this-guy-and-why-is-he-doing-this amazement, my favorite famous person is David Karpeles. What, you never heard of him? Perhaps it’s time you have.

Karpeles is the founder of the Karpeles Manuscript Library Museums, which are located around the country in such places as Santa Barbara, Charleston, Tacoma, Duluth, Shreveport, Jacksonville, Fort Wayne, Buffalo and, yes, Newburgh, N.Y. My jaw dropped the first time I visited the Newburgh museum, located in an imposing old bank on Broadway, and I never fail to say, “Oh, my God, he owns that, every time I return.

The web site states: “The Karpeles Library is the world’s largest private holding of important original manuscripts and documents.” You want famous? The Karpeles list of famous persons, I feel sure, is unmatched by anyone, anywhere, not that he met most of them. Still, on a rotating basis at any of the museums, one might see the original draft of the Bill of Rights of the United States, the original manuscript of “The Wedding March,” Einstein’s description of his Theory of Relativity, the Thanksgiving Proclamation” signed by George Washington, Roget’s Thesaurus (as in, Roget‘s actual Thesaurus, Webster’s actual Dictionary, the first printing of the Ten Commandments from the Gutenberg Bible (1450-1455), Darwin’s Conclusion embodying his theory of Evolution in “Origin of Species,” or the Decree of Pope Lucius III Proclaiming the Sacred Duty of the Knights of the Holy Crusades. And about a million more original documents.

I met David Karpeles at the opening of the Newburgh Museum. He is tall, soft-spoken and as unassuming as anyone so rich and generous could possibly be. A math genius and real estate tycoon, he said he and his wife looked around one day and decided they had collected so much neat stuff, it was time to share it and so they decided to open museums where no one else wanted to put them. Like downtown Newburgh. The museums are open every day, free of charge. You think Trump would do that?

In a way, I guess the Beck beginning to this column is connected to the rest. Meeting the likes of David Karpeles, who isn’t really famous, is what makes it possible to put up with the likes of Glenn Beck, who, unfortunately, is. Put that in your fortune cookie.

*  *  *

Any “famous” encounters you’d like to share with our readers?

Bob can be reached at bob@zestoforange.com.

By Shawn Dell Joyce
Recently, ABC News asked commuters at Grand Central Terminal to remove items of clothing they were wearing that were made in China. Many of the commuters realized that they would soon be standing naked since more than 98 percent of all clothing sold in the U.S. is from China. It is difficult to buy anything that is not made in China today, since the U.S. imports almost half its consumer goods from that one country. Yet we Americans pay dearly in social costs for those cheap imports. We have lost most of our manufacturing jobs, and local industries to overseas exporters, mainly China.

ABC is launching a new show that examines goods made in America, and just how pervasive Chinese imports are in our country. They took a typical American home and removed everything that was made in China: food, rugs, furniture, linens, etc. The family was soon left with a house emptied of everything but the kitchen sink and a few other fixtures that were the only U.S. manufactured goods.

The flood of imported goods from China has nearly tripled since 1997. During that time, China quietly surpassed the United States as the world’s top polluter. China has no real environmental safeguards in place to protect drinking water from contaminants, no labor laws to keep children out of sweatshops, no legal ethics to keep entrepreneurs from producing dangerous products. 

Most of these products wind up on U.S. store shelves without much testing for safety, leading to massive recalls. More than 60 percent of the recalls issued this year and 79 percent of toys recalled last year by the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission were from China. But those products were just a tiny drop in the flood of 17 million shipments of everything from Chinese organic produce to medicines to housewares to toys.

These inferior and often dangerous goods supplant locally made goods on store shelves because they are often cheaper than American made goods. What few consumers realize is that the costs we don’t pay for at the cash register must be paid for by our community and country through the loss of local industry, jobs, and economic impact.

When we opt for a cheaper import, our dollars flow out of our community and fund a system that degrades people and the planet. Our small businesses suffer, manufacturing jobs leave, and we find ourselves with boarded-up storefronts in our downtowns. This economic exodus further devalues our currency and increases the demand for “cheap.” It’s a vicious cycle, and one that we must end if we want to see real economic stimulus.

ABC’s “Made in America” is issuing a challenge to become aware of all the Chinese goods in your home, shopping cart, and on your body. ABC points out that if every American spent an extra $3.33 on U.S.-made goods, it would create almost 10,000 new jobs in this country. Make it a point to read labels and spend a little more to guarantee America’s economic recovery.

“You cast a vote every time you open your wallet,” notes ABC News. What kind of future are you casting a vote for? A future where your children work for Chinese companies or one where America has local industry and jobs again?

The Fog Is Rising

By Carrie Jacobson

It seems to me that there was more fog when I was growing up. Sure there was, figuratively – but I mean really and truly in the weather sense of things.

Maybe that’s just my admittedly foggy memory – but now, it seems there’s fog only on rare autumn mornings, when the fog is over the rivers, the night’s cool dreams meeting the morning’s promise of heat.

When I was a kid, we had whole days of fog. Whole weeks, it seems, even. The fog would roll in off the water and blanket the area, and it was a regular thing, as regular as sunny mornings or rainy ones.

I remember living in Idaho and longing for the fog. Longing for days of rain, too. Longing for those gray New England stretches that of course, as a kid, I couldn’t stand. Spend a year in a place where it’s always sunny, and you’d be surprised what weather you’d yearn for.

At any rate, I had a great time making this painting. I feel like I’ve been freed – and I didn’t even know I was locked up.

Interested in this painting? It is oil on canvas, 36×48. Please contact me for price and delivery information: carrieBjacobson@gmail.com