By Jeffrey Page

A wonderful Yiddish expression goes like this: Pish nisht af mein fus, un dertzail mir az si regant. Translation: Don’t piss on my leg and tell me it’s raining. In other words, spare me the fairy tales and get to real life.

With that in mind, let us turn to a few people who have been relieving themselves on the legs of America lately.

Start with the inimitable Dana Perino, who served as President Bush’s last White House press secretary. Recently, 11 months into President Obama’s term, Perino was on television being interviewed by Sean Hannity.

Hannity lobbed her some softball questions about why the Obama administration refuses to call terrorists “terrorists.” “I don’t say this to be political,” Perino said. “But we should call it what it is.”

Remember those words: We should call it what it is.

Perino then went on to inform viewers about the differences between Bush’s and Obama’s leadership in times of crisis. “We did not have a terrorist attack on our country during President Bush’s term,” Perino said. We should call that what it is, too. It’s garbage.

Perino recalled the Bush glory days and the inferred illusion that no enemy would dare attack the United States with George W. Bush in command. Just one problem. They did attack and he was in command. America was attacked eight months into Bush’s watch on that day he read “The Pet Goat” to some school kids in Florida and froze when an aide whispered what had happened in New York.

So much for Perino’s not wanting to be political. But did Hannity jump in and correct her misstatement? Not that I saw.

Speaking of Hannity, I recall his report a while back about Maj. Stefan Frederick Cook’s refusal to accept Army orders deploying him to Afghanistan on the nutty ground that Obama is not a native born U.S. citizen and therefore ineligible to be president, therefore ineligible to be commander-in-chief, and therefore ineligible to order Cook or any other soldier to do anything.

Hannity noted Cook’s argument with seriousness. “President Obama has not proven that he’s a U.S. citizen.” I wondered who was the last president of the United States who was asked to prove his citizenship.

In the last few days we have been reading of the two White House gatecrashers, Tareq and Michaele Salahi. They say they were invited. The Secret Service says they were not on any list of invitees to the state dinner honoring Manmohan Singh, the Indian prime minister. Eventually this will be resolved.

For now, however, there’s the question of the genius at the Secret Service who reassured a worried nation that President Obama was never in any danger posed by the Salahis because this fun couple from Virginia had passed through metal detectors on their way in to the festivities.

In fact, an official White House photo shows the president extending his right hand to Michaele Sahali. She is grasping it with both her hands as her happy husband looks on. Had Obama and Sahali been any closer they could have done the foxtrot. Not in any danger?

The fact is that if the Secret Service agents working the metal detectors that night were as inattentive and unfocused as the ones handling the guest list, President Obama was in extremely serious peril.

Let us be specific. The current rate of death threats directed against President Obama is 400 percent higher than it was when he assumed office in January. A bumper sticker available on the internet says “Obama lied, our economy died” (a highly charged accusation and another that gives Bush a pass since the economy tanked before Obama ever took office). And, there are the inevitable anti-Obama materials that are illustrated with apes.

Not in any danger?

I need a shower – and plenty of soap.

Jeffrey can be reached at jeffrey@zestoforange.com

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